Hold… the… phone, guys. Who knew 2L would be so fun???
I barely know a little more-than-jack-s(#% about the law, and yet 2L year has given me a sense of tenure that (while virtually meritless) is super fun! I’ve been walking the halls these last few days, ooh-ing and aww-ing at the 1Ls trying to find their way through the Resident Evil-esque construction corridors of Boalt Hall. Occasionally, I will offer a gentle comment like “Don’t let the electrical wires make contact with your hair,” or “The candy bowl in the library is right here, hon,” but mostly I focus hard on refraining from patting them on the head (I’ve been told that’s crossing the line — I guess everyone’s got boundary issues these days.)
God forbid one of the littl’uns actually SAYS something to me, because I LOVE LOVE LOVE giving unsolicited advice (yes, the same advice I mocked on this blog as a 1L myself.) By the way, I’ve found that my instincts last year to disregard such advice were absolutely correct. Half of the time, I’ll say something to one of these 1Ls and then realize, “Hey, Alex, what the f(#$ was that?” In any case, here are just a few creative ideas I’ve come up with for delivering advice to the newly-minted 1L population:
Biblical: ”Ye of class Year 1, Boalt Year 99, God’s year 2010, may the shining light of Legalines lessen your heavy load…”
Fortune Cookie: “Great things come to those who highlight in less than 3 colors,” OR more abstract, “1 24 16 5 9″
Emphatic: ”OH MY GOODNESS!!! LAW SCHOOL!!!! YOU’RE HERE!!!! AHHHHH!!! DON’T EAT THE FREE PIZZA OR YOU’LL GET FAT!”
Cynical: ”He he. THAT teacher? Pssshawww. Buy the outline now. Read outlines in class, don’t listen, read. Read and write. You’ll get it eventually.”
Scare Tactic: “RUN!”
